Emporio Armani White Him (Armani)

Guest review by John

In the 24th century, after the world has collapsed and has been reborn as some sort of sterile dystopian wonderland of bare white walls and windows that look inward onto a manmade garden (because on the other side of the walls are a barren desert), I think everybody will smell like Emporio Armani Him (White.)

But, I must admit a fascination with such a dystopia, though it’s ultimately boring. Beneath the surface of flatness and innocuous toadying is something disturbing and fiery that gives you hope that it, too, will come crashing down.

Anyway, enough with the metaphors.

I like this scent, yet I don’t know why. Or, rather, that’s incorrect. I know why, but it is still surprising because this typically is not a type of scent that I’d like. It’s synthetic, ozonic, fresh and a little citrusy, and intended to be very “pleasant.” These are scents (ala Jil Sander Pure and Jil Sander Sport) that I generally loathe. And yet, EA Him (White) is so pleasant and distinctly futuristic that something about it is fascinating to me, almost intoxicating.

I wear it in the summer, taking that odd likewise 24th century metal/plastic/rubber/ceramic bottle with the subtly non-androgynous “male” bump on its side, with me on my travels, spritzing it on and enjoying the Soma. If Armani is fashion’s Brave New World, I suppose you must count me in as a member and give me my plain undyed cotton smock to wear with the rest of the comrades.

This is a scent we should all hate and fear as good Freedom Lovers and champions of the great Stinkers of History (Jicky, Rose Poivree, Kouros, L’autre), and yet it is just clever enough to make us think that among the millions of herded masses is one that’s going to throw the ax through the movie screen. Is it the White Musk at its base or the Thyme? Perhaps… but there is something here that still plays nice, but makes you take notice.

Sniff it. Everybody’s doing it.

Year Released: 2001
Parfumer: Carlos Benaim
Notes: Bergamot, Lemon, Tangerine, Thyme, Rosemary, Cardamom, White Musk